Wednesday, September 17, 2014

"I Like the Name" A Political Sci Fi Vignette.

                                           "I Like the Name"  A Political Sci Fi Vignette.

I must admit, ladies and gentleman, I did not think it was possible. After all, there were only five of us; Jaybee, Emem, the two brothers and myself. We were sent to an alien planet, tasked with terraforming and readying it for habitation by our people.  Now, most things I can do with half my brain tied behind my back, but this place was totally unsuitable for life. It was too cold, had unbreathable air and was teeming with life-forms incompatible with our needs. Worst of all, a sentient life form had evolved and taken over the place! They were not primitive either, bristling with weapons, highly aggressive and maybe even capable of reaching and destroying our planet! Luckily, they were too divided, self-centered and violent to have even bothered to look around this part of the galaxy and were completely unaware of our overcrowded world and our need for new home.
Our imperfect but functional disguises worked pretty well. The Brothers’ roles kept them out of public view, so other than rare occasions, only head-shot photographs of them were seen. Jaybee and Emem had it the worst, with much in-person contact with the locals. Despite one having a bit of a coloring problem and the other’s look getting close to a lower order of amphibian around the face, they were never suspected. I managed to mostly keep my exposure to my voice, (and a lot of exposure it was) so my somewhat blobby costume rarely came under scrutiny.
Job one, finance, belonged to The Brothers. Not surprisingly, greed is the lever with which one can lift worlds. The Brothers found an enormously wealthy but terminally ill man, whose ailment was one that could be cured by our slightly more advanced technology, and struck a deal to become his heirs in exchange for extending his life by a few decades. Using his nest egg and significant leverage supplied by Jaybee and Emem, upon which I will expound shortly, they embarked on a campaign of strategic acquisition. 
The Brothers had a unique bargaining advantage, while all their competition maneuvered each transaction with the sole motivation of profit, the Brothers only long term goal was control. If you structure a business deal in such a way as the other side makes a lot of profit, you can have any other consideration you desire and the other side does not even notice. By the time our plans started to come to fruition, the brothers owned or controlled nearly every important industry on the planet.
We found a fuel source whose consumption would result in a slow, subtle warming of the hideously cold planet, and arranged for it to be the least expensive energy source. Once again, greed was our true friend.  When alternative energies were invented or touted, the Brothers bought them, let the companies run for a little while and then close them, proclaiming the methods to be impractical.
Many forms of vegetation existed that would be toxic to our people or exuded gasses and chemicals that made the air nearly unbreathable to us. A solution was needed,  guess who was our friend once again? That dear child named greed. Our companies bought food production facilities and farms. We manipulated the food plants to create more yield and so more profit for the farmers. Make the deal so they can have lots of profit and anything else you want is no problem. We made the plants in such a way that any seeds they produced were sterile, the farmers had to buy seeds every year and could not produce their own seed, but they made lots of profit so nary a peep of complaint was heard. Land had to be cleared and weeds removed to grow food, which was a lot of work, so we fixed that. The crops were designed so they were not effected by herbicides that killed all other plants, farmers soaked all the land with the very reasonably priced herbicides we sold them, so they could cover all the ground with crops and nothing else grew.  Profits increased even more, the farmers loved and praised Brothers and the companies they owned.
Eventually, some of the locals, (namely the ones that did not greatly benefit from inexpensive plants and energy or get rich off it) started to catch on. Governments  proposed laws that got in the way of our plans. We had anticipated this, so, using The Brothers money, Jaybee and Emem got to work insinuating themselves into powerful positions in the most powerful government around. Whenever laws were proposed  counter to our goals, those two arranged for the legislators to receive large sums of money from The Brothers. Not only did the legislators block any regulations that got in our way, but they jumped right on the band wagon and continually passed laws that facilitated our plans, and thease lawmakers were not even that expensive to buy!
Of course, It is impossible to have infinite growth in a finite system, so not everyone could be bribed with actual riches. That is where I came in. My compatriots will have to admit, they could have never pulled it off without yours truly. I seduced nearly all of the rest of the planet with the PROMISE of wealth. My conniving voice assured them that they would be the ones who would benefit from our movement. I convinced the people that our naysayers wanted to take away their toys and vices, and told them the toys and vices were their freedoms!
They Bought it! Hook, line and sinker, they manically repeated my supposed truisms, chanted my catch phrases, adopted my slanderous pet names for the brightest and most honest of their politicians and worshiped our toadies as well as Jaybe and Emem, exactly the way I told them to. While the masses starved, struggled and slaved, they simultaneously sympathized, shouted and supported every aspect of our plan. Each one wholeheartedly attending my voice, believing my words, embracing my assurances that they would reap the benefits, they would be the ones on the top of the pyramid and soon have the riches and luxury their greed told them they could not live without.
It really did not take long at all. Conspicuous consumption of the cheap energy sources filled the atmosphere with carbon and the temperature rose. The greedy farmers killed every plant except our patented, certified, modified crops. Oxygen levels dropped and air filled with delicious methane, nitrous oxide ozone and carbon dioxide. Since the government had been convinced there was no need to label or regulate the food crops, the inhabitants of this soon-to-be-our world had been eating poison filled food and burning dirty fuels for decades. Soon they all had, diabetes, COPD and cancer, but, the medicine was all owned by The Brothers corporations who told the world the medicines were no longer effective or available. Then the supply of seeds for food crops became suddenly unavailable too, and the current crops seeds were all sterile. Every one of those dangerous, parasitic humans died before their ( I mean our) planet  made one more trip around the sun.
And there you have it, perfect atmosphere, perfect temperature and climate and no competition, our race could move right in and enjoy the new Earth. We did it, The Brothers Charles and David, Senator Mich  (Emem), Speaker John (Jaybee) and my self. I still think my role was the most important, even though the others made fun of me because I could not come up with an Earth-normal sounding pseudonym for myself, but I disagree, I LIKE the name Rush!

Chuck Hinton, 09/17/14

1 comment:

8MinutesOnHigh said...

I'm with you brother. Although I guessed your name was going to be Fox.

Good job. Good fun. And good night.